Wayne Besen - Author, Activist, Columnist, Public Speaker

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Denver Post: Focus' Mike Haley Was Once A Hooker

(Mike Haley, Former Hooker)

I have long complained that it is nearly impossible to find recloseted homosexuals ("ex-gays") with normal or successful backgrounds. In my book, Anything But Straight, I call these people "the formers" because they are all former junkies, prostitutes, sex addicts or head cases. Instead of taking personal responsibility for their own poor choices and failures, they conveniently blame their sexual orientation.

It turns out that Focus on the Family's Mike Haley fits the description of a "former." Denver Post columnist Cindy Rodriguez has revealed that before Haley was a holy-roller, he was a hooker:

During his gay years, he had a series of relationships with men. He even got arrested for prostitution. (He says he wanted to see how much someone was willing to pay for him.)

Yeah, right and he didn't inhale. He was simply doing research on how much his booty could fetch and had the misfortune of getting busted on his first sexcapade. Sure, we believe you, Mike.

The truth is, Focus on the Family has long used "experts" on gay life that lack credibility and are not qualified to talk about anything, really. One wonders if they troll gutters behind gay bars looking for fall-down drunks and street walkers that they can convert with the help of big fat paychecks?

This practice is rather immoral and predatory and speaks to the lack of values at Focus on the Family. If James Dobson were an honest man, he would only recruit recloseted homosexuals who came from backgrounds of decency, success and valor. After all, if the GLBT movement uses educated and accomplished spokespeople, why can't Focus do the same?

But, I submit that Dobson would have a very difficult time finding such people, because they are well adjusted and strong-minded enough to have moved beyond right wing propaganda. These gay individuals lead, happy, rich and fulfilling lives, so they have no need to sell their souls. Stuck with this dilemma, Dobson is forced to dig up dregs; throwing them in the shower, slapping on a suit and pushing them out on stage to offer false testimony - for a hefty fee.

This freak show element to Focus on the Family's Closet Assistance Program is vividly portrayed in Rodriguez's column:

They [Focus] had a tent, and it might as well have been a circus. ("Step right up and meet our amazing 'ex-gay' employees!") I was waiting for the bearded lady to show up.

There would never be a bearded lady, because Dobson surely would have made her shave before he pushed her in the spotlight. However, if Rodriguez would have waited around long enough, she would have seen a lady who is a beard. Her name is Mrs. Haley.

112 Comments:

Every single exgay in the AFA's film "It's Not Gay" is exgay for pay.

http://www.exgaywatch.com/blog/archives/2006/05/video_its_not_g_1.html
posted by Daniel Gonzales, at 7/26/2006 11:29 AM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:35 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:43 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:45 PM

Wayne will now be erasing blogs.
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:45 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:46 PM

I hope I am keeping you busy
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:46 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:47 PM

Mike's picture, like most photos of "ex-gays" still exude that queer je ne sais quoi. They can pretend all they want, but their true inner selves are reflected in their eyes and body language. That photo of Allen Chambers that Wayne has had on here a number of times says it all.
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:47 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:48 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:49 PM

San Diego has its own version of Mike Haley. His name is James Hartline and his mission is to stop the "corruption that plagues Hillcrest" (for those who are not familiar with Hillcrest... Hillcrest is to San Diego what WeHo is to LA and the Castro is to San Francisco). Unfortunately, Hartline doesn't realize that he is the corruption in Hillcrest.

Hartline claimed that the only reason he got HIV is because he was gay, but I think he was a slut who cruised around the bathhouses for anonymous, unprotected sex. Now he said that that "God would cure him from HIV". Now he is aiming to close down the few bathhouses and a lot of gay bars in San Diego (he already accomplished the closure of Club Mustang in North Park).

This coming weekend, Hartline is going after San Diego Pride. He claimed that there are some pedophiles working as staff at the events. I just hope Hartline would actually get a life.

For more on James Hartline, there is an article in San Diego CityBeat (www.sdcitybeat.com) about him and his objective.

Blood From Machines
San Diego, CA
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:52 PM

"mary" is obviously a whack-job; if you hate wayne so much you're free to leave and never come back.
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:52 PM

ps..mary, there are no "ex-gays" so wayne cant attack what doesnt exit. So, bugger off, luv!
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:55 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 1:08 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 1:12 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 1:15 PM

I think Wayne deserves some kind of merit badge for the constant assaults he gets from cowardly, anonymous posters who have nothing better to do than to attack his work. Just remember, Wayne, they wouldn't go after you so much if they weren't afraid of you.

--Johnny in Minneapolis
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 1:35 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 1:46 PM

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posted by Trixie, at 7/26/2006 1:49 PM

Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 12:47 PM

WOW. If that's how "liberals" think, I'm glad I'm a conservative.

Yeah, I don't always agree with Wayne, but this person is just plain nasty. Now I get why it is that Wayne removes some entries. If this were my blog, I'd also delete all the repulsive racial slurs and brainless invective.

Besides, what idiot thinks that this blog is "a free speech zone" or complains about censorship on a private website?

Timothy
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 2:00 PM

Actually, Trixie...

Wayne isn't stereotyping when he assumes that all ex-gays "agree with the tactics of right wing political groups". I wish he was. But I've yet to see a single prominant ex-gay who is not also an anti-gay political activist. Not one.

I don't doubt that there probably are some folks who identify as ex-gay that are now living in a fully integrated "heterosexual lifestyle". We can dispute whether or not they ever were gay, whether they are bisexual, or whether there actually is some tiny number of gay people that for some reason were capable of reorientation.

But what is not disputable is that there isn't a single one of them that says "hey, I was gay. Leave the gay people alone." Not one.

And this leads some of us to suspect that the very visible reorientations of the political ex-gays are based more on political declaration and public religious display than they are on a real change in attractions.

Perhaps I'm wrong. But so far ex-gay persons who are not also anti-gay activists seem to be about as common as unicorns.

Timothy
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 2:10 PM

I re-iterate for the idiot mary what i said above. THERE ARE NO EX-GAYS. Anyone who truely IS gay has it hardwired into the brain, a fact being established more and more by SCIENCE, not religious superstitious bullshit. Underneath Michael Jacksons surgery and skin bleach he is still an African. Any truely gay man or woman who forces themselves to get married and have hetero sex is, behind the charade, still queer!
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 2:30 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 2:31 PM

In my post I make the point that recloseted homosexuals are often mentally unbalanced and lack character. It is nearly impossible to find an "ex-gay" who doesn't have a bizarre past. I appreciate the psycho anonymous poster for so vividly proving my point.

However, this blog will not be abused and filled with hate speech and propaganda from people who appear to need serious professioal help.

To the neurotic anonymous blogger: You appear to love blogging. So, much so, you should start your own. Just because you are too lazy or obtuse to open your own, does not give you the right to be a parasite on mine. Now, please go and start your own blog, www.loser.com, and stop bothering us your mental grafiti.
posted by Wayne Besen, at 7/26/2006 2:47 PM

Wayne;

I was under the impression that you banned annonimous posts. I agree, this creature is affraid, and yes, we know you hit a nerve when posted this.

I also agree that there are not "ex-gays" they are just repressing themselves.

I enjoy a lot your blogg Wayne, and through it, many people get informed of the many doings of the so called conservatives (my question is, what are they trying to "conserve"
Conservative = destroyer

I know that you didn't ask but I vote for you to change the settings and make people sign a name.
posted by Dan, at 7/26/2006 2:59 PM

Blood from Machines,

I distinguish between Haley and Hartline.

Haley may have - for religious reasons - decided to live as though he were not attracted to the same sex. He may have chosen to try and change his behaviors, his way of living, and even try, hope, pray, and beg that his internal orientation would change. He may have decided to adopt a political agenda that is designed to be punitive and cruel to gay people. He may even have chosen to use lies as a tool to advance that agenda. He may have abandoned all that is decent and pursued an immoral path of deception and cruelty. But he's not insane.

I believe Hartline, however, probably is clinically insane. It's clear that he's delusional (he thinks he's a prophet who will be miraculously healed from AIDS) and schizophrenic (he thinks he's seen demons). Hartline is annoying and actively seeks to make the lives of others less pleasant. Hartline says things that are outrageous and cruel. And I have no desire to let Hartline go unchallenged or not point out that he's not a credible source. But on some level I pity him.

Haley has chosen his path. And while Hartline too has chosen this direction, it's clear that he is being taken advantage of by those who should know better.

Timothy
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 3:02 PM

Hartline is mentally unavailable. He seems like the guy who just couldn't take it anymore and snapped. He is not a good representative of the ex-gay culture.
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 3:43 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 3:53 PM

Oooh I seem to have missed all the fun! Serves me right for not checking in here often enough!

Timothy, I enjoyed your comments.

From time to time, in a kind of masochistic urge, I look at the NARTH web site, to check for any credible science or any credible acount of one whose sexual desire has changed.

My latest foray there has made my opinion of that organisation and its motives and veracity (or lack of it) plummet rapidly much further. This is because they cite, and put their own particular "spin" on, comments by a Nigerian professor about the danger of spread of AIDS posed by homosexuality in that country. http://www.narth.com/docs/nigeria.html
I mean, come ON! Africa is well known, of course, for the complete and total celibacy of its heterosexuals outside of monogamous marriage, and their complete and total fidelity within it.......

The recent mention again by Wayne of Inqueery led me to look again at that execrable site. This time I followed the link to the Time article. MOST interesting! It is stated explicitly in that Time article that dear Chadwick's sexual desire has not in fact changed from same-sex to opposite-sex at all. He still fancies guys. Surprise!

Wayne has provided a singular service by writing his book. Time after time after time, the truth of what he says about "ex-gays" is demonstrated.
posted by Phil, at 7/26/2006 3:58 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 4:37 PM

Anonymous, why must Wayne know every ex-gay, to make the claims he makes?

Anonymous, if you know anyone whose sexual desire has changed from same-sex to opposite sex, would that person or those persons known to you be willing to correspond with me, describing how this change took place?
posted by Phil, at 7/26/2006 4:48 PM

The so called "ex-gays" put themselves in the public view, express their extrange perspectives, appoint themselves as "representatives" of the "miracle" of "change" and then, some one in this blog has the nerve to -sarcastically- say that Wayne may know all the so called "ex-gays".

That is just pure trash. I always say, if you people (so called "ex-gays") want to "change" and do it with women, or with yourselves is your damned problem... enjoy it! but don't poison the minds of youth, struglin to find themselves, or the mind of men all over the planet that believed the lie that "homosexuality is bad" keep it to yourselves, go and live in a compaund like the poligamist, but stop spreading your crazines!
posted by Dan, at 7/26/2006 5:32 PM

I have no idea if anyone is going to read this far down a trolled thread, but it is entirely consistent with the fundamentalist/evangelical mindset to choose a spokesperson who has been totally degraded, or who is ordinary but pretends to have been totally degraded, in order to be able that Jesus can fix anybody.

NancyP
posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 6:09 PM

Agreed. The problem, however, is not in believing that Jesus can fix anyone. I think that comes with faith. The problem is the assertion that there is something to be fixed. But you are correct. The Christian right will put a man on the street on his knees so folks will think he is legless, then, Hallaluya, he has legs. Such is the power of Jesus. Can I get an Amen? (Spoken in my best Southern Preacher accent)
posted by jekelhyde, at 7/26/2006 7:08 PM

Interesting thought, NancyP.

Wayne has pointed out also (and it can easily be seen by looking at the websites) the curious blurring of lines between supposed clinical methodology and miracle cure.

NARTH is SUPPOSED to be about science. They purport to understand scientific reasons for homosexual desire, and they suggest clinical methodologies to alter sexual orientation. BUT, they prominently feature Mr. Alan Medinger, who says he was cured by "a whole bunch of miracles" one night at a prayer meeting!

Why this blurring, this obfuscation?

Perhaps significantly, I do not think the NARTH site will ever feature someone "cured" by a whole bunch of miracles at an Islamic, Hindu, Bhuddist, Shintoist etc prayer meeting. Why not?
posted by Phil, at 7/26/2006 7:58 PM

jeckelhyde, your comments remind me of something I saw on TV about five years ago.

It was a TV news report on national television in the UK about reports of miracles at a "Christian" rally in England.

Two things were reported to be happening: 1) Mercury amalgam dental fillings were being turned to gold and 2) people were getting a sheen of gold dust on their skin.

So along goes the reporter to talk to people. He interviews two "fillings" candidates who obligingly open their mouths wide for the camera. The first has obvious dark gray ordinary mercury amalgam fillings, and the second is PATENTLY holding a gold ring against her gum!

As for the gold on ths skin, the reporter spoke to a group of youths and said "it looks like perspiration to me....."

One Anglican clergyman (good on him), commenting on the whole absurd sham said something along the lines of "In a world with wars and starving children, if God is going to perform miracles today, why should he bother first with the fillings of fairly well-heeled middle-class people in the South of England?"

Regarding the purchase of "Reparative Therapy" to change sexual desire, I'm reminded of something said by the Hebrew prophet Isaiah of old: "Why do you people keep paying out money for what is not bread, and why is your toil for what results in no satisfaction?"
posted by Phil, at 7/26/2006 8:26 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 9:14 PM

You say that the Christian Right doesn't want to allow gays rights. It's more than that. They don't want us to exist, so they shuffle around the ex-gay caravan and say, "See, these people can be straight, they just choose not to be." Well, we can't. It's that simple. If you can and did, great. More power to you, but you are a rarity. An anomaly, even. You are not a victim and gay people are not the intolerant ones. If you feel victimized, don't blame Wayne. Blame the Dobson's of the world who put us on the defensive. He's the one trying to hold you up as an example and using you to keep us from having rights. If anything, you should be offended by the exploitation. You also need to understand that the victim mode is a mode used by many "Ex-Gay" groups to make gays appear intolerant. When you start, it makes people think you are one of them. And it wouldn't surprise most people to find them planting people here.

I'm not judging. I'm just reasoning. Hope you understand.

Darren
posted by jekelhyde, at 7/26/2006 9:25 PM

Our anonymous friend is unlikely a liberal, nor an ex-gay. He/she has spent more time on this blog than I have - and my name is on it. Thisperson also has an obvious agenda.

To the circus act: Please stop posting. You are obsessed and creepy and not who you claim to be. And, I will delete your uninformed comments immediately.

Thanks!
posted by Wayne Besen, at 7/26/2006 9:28 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/26/2006 10:05 PM

Anonymous, are you indicating that you formerly felt sexual desire for your own sex, but now desire only the opposite sex? Is that what you are saying?

If so, would you describe what method brought this change? Was it a clinical methodology or a religious miracle?

I should be most interested to listen to your account of your change, and will happily correspond privately with you if you would rather not discuss it here.

Thank you.
posted by Phil, at 7/27/2006 7:38 AM

P.S. Anonymous, in view of the urgent desire you express to 'get the truth out', I am confident that you will be eager to assist in relation to my request.
posted by Phil, at 7/27/2006 7:40 AM

Just an add on to Wayne´s ex-gay-for-pay observation, not always the ex-gay are rewarded simply money for their deceiving acts, although money comes as a real matter a lot of times, since most of then now make a living of it. But to many the need of acceptance (or what they think is acceptance)and to belong to a group are reward enough to sell their souls, and just guess to whom this "acceptance" talks louder? the bizarre caracters, the low end freaks and losers. The people who were unlucky or weak to make the right decisions and make thenselves well adjusted persons. And the religious right goes after then, charms then with promises of recognizement and praise and they buy it. But to keep the newfound "approval" of the religious "friends" this poor souls have to become haters, they have to prove thenselves everyday by bashing their own personas in whatever gay people cross their ways . It´s tragically Faustian, mefistofeles would be jealous of this "good christians".
posted by Roger, at 7/27/2006 10:23 AM

Again, sorry Phil. Wayne continues to delete blogs. He is afraid of the truth. He continues to say that I am not what I am. He must not believe that we landed on the moon - since he never did see that with his own eyes - either. Unfortunately, because of attacks such as Wayne's, people will protect their private lives. this is a detriment to you.
posted by Anonymous, at 7/27/2006 1:32 PM

Anonymous,

I mean no disrespect, but if you are as you claim, why do you feel the need to jump into a fight that does not concern. If you are ex-gay, how do gay people who supposedly harrass you know that you are ex-gay to put you up for said harrassment. What is your reason for stalking the blog? What do you seek to gain? Is it because you are so minute an minority that you don't know where to fit? Because there is no one else like you, you feel you don't have a home. I think you should go stalk the Ex-gay sites and leave Wayne alone for a while. I think everyone would appreciate it.

Thanks a bunch,

Darren
posted by jekelhyde, at 7/27/2006 2:30 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/27/2006 2:53 PM

Actually, the case is choosing to change. It's the probability of change which is nil for all but, well maybe just you.
posted by jekelhyde, at 7/27/2006 3:01 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/27/2006 3:17 PM

Anonymous,

I am not one of those who are convinced that no one can change their orientation. I just haven't run into any reliable sources yet that claim to have done exactly that.

You claim to be such a person. But you are already displaying dishonesty. You are claiming that Wayne is opposed to people being free to choose. This is a gross misstatement of what Wayne has said.

Also you claim "I know alot of people. They are just not interested in being confrontive with the Christian community or the gay activists who get rather mean."

That simply isn't true. You do not know "a lot of people" that are ex-gay but for some reason just aren't visible. If this were the case, then surely someone somewhere other than you would be aware of this phenominon. But for some reason, the rest of us don't know such people. Only you.

Your hostility and your willingness to play fast and loose with the facts suggests to me that you are not credible.

Sorry, but you appear to be yet another false witness for the ex-gay ministries. I would have a whole lot more respect for the ex-gay movement if it focused as much on honesty as it does on activism.

Timothy
posted by Anonymous, at 7/27/2006 4:04 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/27/2006 4:43 PM

I love the way this clown has pretended not to be a professional activist, but has spent 2 entire days on this blog posting nonsense.

Please, get a real job and get off this site. You have way too much time on your hands.

And, you are a liar.
posted by Wayne Besen, at 7/27/2006 5:51 PM

Wayne:

I must conffess I get a twisted kick out of the flaming attacks from your critics anytime you hit to close to home.

I know it must be annoying to have these lame-brains infiltrate your personal blog -- but like so many of your other friends and supporters here have already pointed out ... it just means you are doing your job!

You have my support and gratitude ... Just Keep on doing what you are doing Wayne! We need your voice and your efforts and ignore the wing-nuts from the peanut gallery.

--
Paul in Houston
posted by Anonymous, at 7/27/2006 8:12 PM

I'm with Paul. I'm also convinced that this person is the same person who claims to be a man and always ends with, "Peace." If not, than they are reading from the same script. If this is not the case, anyonomous, then show yourself. I am willing to give anyone the benefit of the doubt, but you are trying my patience. Which is a very difficult thing to do.
posted by jekelhyde, at 7/27/2006 8:57 PM

FYI, this "Peace" person has been posting in "A Couple of Disasters." He/she has still not responded to my latest challenge.
posted by jekelhyde, at 7/27/2006 9:28 PM

Anonymous at 10:23 I think you raise an important point about the fact that motives of "ex-gays" may not be simple financial ones.

The need for "belonging" is an important human psychological need and I feel sure that it's the fact of having a 'peer group' of sorts and needing their approval, that keeps many "ex-gays" going.

But in the end, if the peer group is collectively dishonest, and the "ex-gay" individual is kidding himself, then this involvement will only last till the penny inevitably and irrevocably drops. Perhaps a couple of years.

Then, unless the deeper and darker motive of financial gain - "ex-gay for pay" - takes over, the individual faces and proclaims the truth about his unchanged sexual desire.
posted by Phil, at 7/28/2006 7:57 AM

Perhaps I am a bit paranoid, but it seems to me that a person who his not trying to gain something from stalking this blog would have gotten pissed and given up long before now. What is your agenda, Anonymous? Why do you stalk this man's blog? Who are you working for and what do you hope to gain???
posted by jekelhyde, at 7/29/2006 12:23 AM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/29/2006 11:50 AM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/29/2006 12:00 PM

But you didn't answer my question. Why are you stalking the blog if you have nothing to gain. I think it fairly obvious that people on this post simply don't believe you. And your victim stance makes it all the more unbelievable. This is the crap that the anti-gay "Ex-gay" groups pull. What is your purpose for coming out as an ex-gay if not for financial or political gain??
posted by jekelhyde, at 7/29/2006 5:00 PM

JH, what if people went round saying you did not exist? Or saying you were a right winger? We all have something to gain if we look at the truth. The truth in this case being - that some (not all) some people do change. And of those some (not all) are sympathetic to gays. Just setting the record straight (no pun intended) Clumping everyone into a narrow perspective is wrong - gays should know that by now. Besides, I am pro-gay and I have everything to gain if this country recognizes the rights of people. But I can't say I am not ex-gay to satisfy yours or anyone else's ideals. And gyas should also know that by now.
posted by Anonymous, at 7/29/2006 6:18 PM

Actually, people do say I don't exist. As they show it, I could be straight if I wanted to. You are simply attempting to usher that ignorant thought process through. I've been very patient and have given you the benefit of the doubt. I can say that there may be a small percentage of individuals who can change orientation. But you keep harping on the same damn thing. You are spouting the words of the Exodus, PFOX, and the like. And you are stalking the blog, awaiting every opportunity to jump in and play the poor me ex-gay victim. And folks are not supposed to be suspicious of your motives? What do you have to gain in this? Because I'll tell you, we have a lot to lose.
posted by jekelhyde, at 7/29/2006 8:09 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/29/2006 8:36 PM

oops I really did mean to say they DON'T get my money - really sorry about that. I cannot stand exodus or pfox. they are both ugly organizations disguised to abolish homosexuals.
posted by Anonymous, at 7/29/2006 8:38 PM

Actually, I don't get angry very often. And for the most part, anything people say to me or about me, I tend to brush off. But these people are using lies and half-truths to deny me basic rights. And take a minute to read the Websites for Exodus and PFOX. Their words are dripping from your fingertips.

If you are what you say you are, good for you. More power to ya. But I'll say again, you are an extreme rarity.
posted by jekelhyde, at 7/29/2006 8:45 PM

Dammit, I hate it when a thought posts twice. Wayne, if you get a second, would you delete one of those
posted by jekelhyde, at 7/29/2006 9:22 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/29/2006 10:05 PM

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posted by Anonymous, at 7/30/2006 5:07 PM

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