Tuesday, September 19, 2006
(Weekly Column)In the pastoral foothills of North Carolina, nearly 2000 conservative Christians anxiously gathered this past Sunday in a school auditorium converted into a makeshift revival meeting. The make-up was as thick as the anticipation and the hairdos higher than the choir's soaring notes. The standing room only crowd was whiter than a convention of ghosts and overflowed into an adjacent room with a big screen television. As the music played people held up massive Bibles and hollered and hooted as if they were in a heated competition for the Lord's ear.
The clean cut and wholesome-looking families were not waiting on evangelical titans such as Billy Graham or Rev. Jerry Falwell, but on the somewhat obscure ex-gay leader
Tim Wilkins, who directs Wake Forest-based
Cross Ministries.
The revival was a deliberate response to a provocative new
ad campaign by the organization
Faith In America, which challenges what it refers to as "Religion-based bigotry." Faith in America is directed by
Rev. Jimmy Creech, who was dismissed by the United Methodist Church for performing a commitment ceremony for a same-sex couple, and was founded by North Carolina furniture mogul
Mitchell Gold, who had invited me to attend this event.
Rev. Wilkins confidently strode to the pulpit like an old pro, as a palpably nervous buzz ricocheted through the pews. The consummate salesman, he peddled more goods than a Wal Mart Christmas sale. While the ex-gays say they are too busy to keep reliable statistics or publish peer-reviewed studies, no one has ever accused them of sloth when it comes to penning books or recording DVDs.
In his sermon, Wilkins repeatedly made the stunning acknowledgement that people do not choose to be gay. Instead, he erroneously blamed homosexuality on a wide array of possibilities including the standard pseudo-scientific canards of parental abuse and dysfunction. To his credit, Rev. Wilkins confessed that his "theories" could not be applied to all gay people.
Equally surprising was that Wilkins unwittingly admitted that he was not cured, but merely suppressing his sexuality. He tried to spin this message by reducing the deep, intrinsic identity of "sexual orientation" to a nagging "temptation." However, it was striking how after 30 years of ex-gay ministry and marriage, Wilkins was no more than a wink from a twink away from falling off the hetero wagon.
To drive home this point, he reiterated that he would not watch Brokeback Mountain because he feared that his resistance might melt like butter near a fire. I pointed out that as a gay man I have watched hundreds of heterosexual dramas and not once was enticed to become straight. Watching Pretty Woman, for instance, did not make me want to sleep with Julia Roberts. He had no answer for this.
Wilkins stressed that those who don't become straight or successfully celibate fail because they are not sufficiently obedient to God. From my experience this message is particularly dangerous. People who don't "change" after long and emotionally draining efforts often think they have been rejected by a God who doesn't hear their prayers while He helps others become heterosexual. This can often lead to low self-esteem, severe depression and even suicide.
The most constructive part of Wilkens' message was that he frequently urged the crowd to love gay people and not harshly condemn them. Of course, his cynical reason was that this would only retard their progress on the path to salvation. Looking around, I could see that this notion of basic tolerance was a significant challenge to many in the audience who were brought up in churches where virulent homophobia was the norm.
This message was an improvement only in that audience members were now more inclined to biblically browbeat than actually beat homosexuals. The question is will this newfound "tolerance" wear thin when it becomes clear that the gays targeted for conversion can't change?
Most significant, however, was when Wilkens asked the crowd if they knew someone who was gay. A sea of hands rose and the preacher remarked that when he asked this question ten years ago, less than 10 percent of audiences raised their hands. Today, he said, the number can exceed eighty percent of a congregation.
Here, in the foothills, it was becoming clear that the gay community had gained a foothold. The crowd was not there to gripe about homosexuals, but searching for ways to grapple with a loved one who had come out.
Following the service, Rev. Creech, Gold and I met Wilkens and his small entourage at the Red Lobster for a late night dinner. Although we agreed on little, at least we were amicably talking. It seems that the love that dare not speak its name is babbling with a deep southern accent in the most unlikely of places.
70 Comments:
The preachings are as outdated as their reference material. Religion is supposed to offer direction for confused flock during emotional times, instead these preachers are creating more confusion by offering personal judgement on every human aspect. Certianly this is not the way to educate people. The problem is more with the institutions which try to opine on everyday aspect of human life. This is common problem with all religions. Instead they should focus on issues such as poverity family values. Should not try to define what is family.
posted by , at
9/19/2006 10:47 PM
Did anyone see the ex-Gov. of NJ Jim McGreevey on Oprah yesterday? He was a perfect example of how destructive it is for entire families when gay people try to play heterosexual. He even admitted that he came out against gay marriage to protect his identity. He, of course, really was and still is in favor of it.
Although he stressed the fact that gay people, including teens and children, needed to be allowed to be "who God made them", I wished he had stressed more the destructiveness and futility of "ex-gay ministries".
Gay New Jerseyans knew through the grapevine that he was gay, years before he finally came out. And he did fib to Oprah about one thing that I know of. He told her that he only did bookstores and truckstops, but not the bars. I have friends who had seen him in the gay bars in Cape May when he was still governor.
Gary (NJ)
posted by , at
9/20/2006 10:23 AM
As gay people, we know that it is the fundamentalists who need to change when it comes to the subject of gays and lesbians. I think the softening of previously harsh rhetoric is an expected natural evolution that is and will occur in many fundamentalist churches. They will likely never say, "We were wrong on this issue," but they will soften some of the hues, and turn what was once black and white surety into gradient thought.
Jerry Falwell is a prime example. In the 1980's, gays were "perverts". Today, Falwell largely avoids an issue that was once his bread and butter. One of his more recent pronouncements on the issue indicated that he believed that gays should not be subject to employment discrimination. Equal rights for perverts? Obviously, even Falwell's understanding of gays has been altered.
Gov. Jim McGreevy is a prime example of the failure of the fundamentalist message, and heterosexuals have been realizing the truth. When I was a teenager, I heard Jimmy Swaggart on TV say, "All a homosexual needs to do is get himself a wife and he will become normal!" Well, Jim McGreevy did so, and it was an unmitigated disaster. I have to believe that even in the most conservative congregations, many quietly know this truth.
posted by , at
9/20/2006 10:36 AM
Gary, I too watched Jim McGreevey yesterday on Oprah's show. It must have been really cathartic for him to talk so openly about his sexuality and about the terrible situation that he put himself in. If only all politicians could be so contrite and honest. We can forgive him for not mentioning his foray into gay bars in Cape May. In a way he's become one of my heroes. It took great courage and strength of character to do what he did and I admire him for it. He's definitely become a good role model for those people struggling to come out, married or otherwise. I'm sure a lot of ex-gay felt uncomfortable listening to the truth for once.
Robert, NYC.
posted by , at
9/20/2006 11:00 AM
I'm very encouraged by all the people in North Carolina who raised their hands indicating they know someone who is gay. When I was growing up in a small town in South Carolina, nobody would have said they knew anybody who was gay because all of us were closeted. Looking back as an adult, there were gay people everywhere in my small town, but most were married.
Now, apparently, even in the rural south, gay folks are coming out in increasing numbers and that's real progress. There's no better way to end discrimination than living your life honestly and openly. It's harder to hate someone you know personally than it is to hate an anonymous group.
posted by Sam, at
9/20/2006 11:57 AM
I suspect (and hope) sometime in the distant future, after we're long gone. Americans will look back at this period in history and shake their heads in wonderment at how horribly sexual minorities were treated, in much the same way we now are astounded at how African Americans and Native Americans were treated with no pangs of conscience.
posted by , at
9/20/2006 12:33 PM
In a way he's become one of my heroes. It took great courage and strength of character to do what he did and I admire him for it.
Robert, NYC. While I’m sure your feelings are sincere, what McGreevey did was not an act of courage, it was an act of cowardice. He came out because he was being blackmailed and about to be outed. He installed his boyfriend in a state Homeland Security position, a position he was woefully unqualified for and legally could not hold given his status as a foreign national. McGreevey’s administration was plagued by scandals of kickbacks, bribes, influence peddling and office buying. He was under investigation and almost certainly would have been defeated in his re-election bid. In short, the man was a crook and it was finally catching up to him. To many of us in NJ, gay and straight, it looked like McGreevey, seeing the writing on the wall, took the easy way out.
The McGreevey saga is a good example of what can happen when gay men try to pretend they are straight. But, as many gays and lesbians in NJ feel, Jim is no hero, no role model. He is an embarrassment.
posted by , at
9/20/2006 12:58 PM
"Old Time Religion With a New Twist," is still old time religion. I for one am really uncomfortable with the effort by gay groups like HRC to accommodate to religious folk. While some decry gay alienation from religion, I take this as a good thing.
If "ex-gays" like Jim Wilkins truly love us, they will back our full civil rights. This is all I want from him or any of his ilk.
The growing secularization of much of Western Europe, something condemned by religious leaders like Pope Benedict-Ratzinger, is one reason why same-sex rights are far advanced in those places when compared to the Jesusland of America. Religion is a drag on human progress.
Progressive religious folks I know are more than happy to support gay rights with no expectation that we attend their churches or "dialog" with them on religious matters. Hopefully, Jimmy Creech is among these progressives.
We ought to be promoting separation of church and state and demanding that our civil rights be recognized by our follow citizens, religious and non-religious alike.
posted by Bob Schwartz, at
9/20/2006 2:17 PM
"Religion is supposed to offer direction for confused flock during emotional times"
Time and again, the Biblical version of it always does.
posted by , at
9/20/2006 2:27 PM
I support the separation of church and state. I also support the separation of church and hate.
posted by Stuffed Animal, at
9/20/2006 4:44 PM
In my research and my definitive conclusion, homosexuality is a deviate sexual behavior. Regardless of how one person derive at the notion of their orientation, no good thing has come with anyone participating with a sinful and judged lifestyle such as homosexuality.
posted by The Captain, at
9/20/2006 6:14 PM
I have seen that on most of the religious website about change that it says it cannot be prayed away. Also, many of them say that God loves people no matter who they are.
posted by , at
9/20/2006 7:09 PM
McGreevey will never be one of my heroes. Regardless of his closeted life or victimization - he put his own interest above national security. A person who has that much unsearched life should not be in a position of authority. I don't care if he is a victim or not - he put his self interest above ethics.
posted by , at
9/20/2006 7:12 PM
"Religion is supposed to offer direction for confused flock during emotional times."
I'm sorry, but the arrogance of this statement is disturbing. This is written as if it is a well know established fact. If that is one person's opinion, fine, but it is stated as fact. Prefacing that statement with "I think" would be appropriate I believe. I, for one, happen to disagree with that.
In my opinion, it is pretty difficult for us humans to tell the Creator how far His moral commands should extend into our personal lives. If there is a Creator, I think we all can agree that as created beings, we certainly do not have that right. Fortunately,(or unfortunately), we have a free will and God does not force us to obey, but we reap the consequence of our choices.
According to God's Word, God's moral commands are good things. They are helpful! If everyone carried them out, this world would be a lot better place to live in. All of God's commands are meant to protect us from harm and/or to provide the benefits of obedience. This holds true whether it has to deal with homosexuality or heterosexuality. We have freedom, but not freedom without accountability.
I understand though that this is very difficult to understand or accept if you find yourself dealing with homosexual tendancies. If I were struggling like that, I would probably not want to accept that, but at least Tim is trying to spread the message with love rather than condemnation. I appreciate his honesty and openness as well.
posted by , at
9/20/2006 8:13 PM
Why are they focusing on outlawing divorce since it is the biggest sin being committed by members of the church???
posted by , at
9/20/2006 8:47 PM
I frequent a Gay Christian chat room. More and more, gay men and women from the south and from restrictive church backgrounds are becoming regulars to the room. They are coming out, in droves, and they are forcing the people who love them to accept them for who they are, or leave them alone to pursue their own lives and loves. We're not there yet, obviously. But we're taking baby steps.
posted by jekelhyde, at
9/20/2006 9:30 PM
Oh, and Captain...define homosexual lifestyle. Then we'll talk about sin and judgement.
posted by jekelhyde, at
9/20/2006 9:36 PM
I find it amusing when "anonymi" claim to know the mind of God, beyond the shadow of a doubt. They don't even know enough ancient Greek and ancient Hebrew and contextual literature and history and archaelogy to make even a somewhat educated guess about historically accurate translation and historically plausible interpretations of Biblical writings.
NancyP
posted by , at
9/20/2006 10:27 PM
I agree heartily with Robert, NYC. I also saw the McGreevey interview with Oprah yesterday, and I was truly moved by his candor, depth, and piercing understanding. He understands both how and why his behavior was reprehensible, while he also understands, profoundly, why it came to be. He's an unlikely hero, perhaps, but he's now a major hero to me as well. He leads the way for honesty, integrity, and proper remorse. I hope he becomes a model for homophobes to realize how much harm they've caused, and then come clean with true contrition, and end the harm -- just as McGreevey has.
Note that Oprah never made it "easy" for him. And yet she, herself, was clearly touched by him. I think their mutual affection at the end was genuine.
And I've rarely heard a more powerful argument for same-sex marriage than the story of Jim McGreevey (while the argument was made explicit, in concise words, just before the very end of the show).
That may have been the most affecting, powerful TV interview I've personally even seen.
posted by , at
9/20/2006 10:37 PM
typo, sorry: personally eveR seen
posted by , at
9/20/2006 10:38 PM
We all could use a lesson in Hebrew, Greek, Coptic Greek, and Aramaic. I never trust what someone else tells me about scripture until I read it for myself, investigate it's historical reference as to time place and culture and then pray on it. I see just as many on both sides going along mouthing off without any idea of what they are saying.
posted by , at
9/20/2006 10:38 PM
"In my research and my definitive conclusion, homosexuality is a deviate sexual behavior. Regardless of how one person derive at the notion of their orientation, no good thing has come with anyone participating with a sinful and judged lifestyle such as homosexuality."
Lord, deliver me! Another clueless Bible beater who leads with his ego instead of with his intellect. So nothing good has ever come from being homosexual, has it? Tell that to the millions of Lesbians and Gay men all over the world whose lives have been enriched by long-term, same-gender relationships. Tell that to the millions of parents who consider their Gay son or daughter (and the same-gender partner of their son or daughter) an absolute blessing. Tell that to the millions people who love art, entertainment and literature that was produced by Gay people. Tell that to any Gay teacher or counselor who's saved a questioning young person from committing suicide by coming out to them. Tell that to the millions of Lesbian nuns and Gay priests whose sexual orientation has given them special insights to use in their service to God and humanity. Tell that to God, who created Gay people for His own Divine purpose!
If folks like you would ever decide to crawl up out of the Dark Ages, you might learn something useful. For instance, that being Gay is about more than sex, and that there's a difference between worshipping the Bible and worshipping the Lord. I get so damn tired of people trying speak for God! Religious egotism has reached epidemic proportions! We can't narrow God down to fit inside of our petty human prejudices, and He doesn't have to wait until we understand His will before He executes it!
posted by Stuffed Animal, at
9/21/2006 2:35 PM
Why are people attacking McGreevey as harming national security because he appointed his boyfriend to the ***phony*** homeland security post? Look at all the ineffective appointments Bush made. Remember in the wake of Katrina, "you're doing a heck of a job, Brownie". Or how about appointing hate monger firebrands as UN ambassador. Another thing, McGreevey's level of corruption pales in comparison to the current administration's and scores of congressmen. At worst, McGreevey was a dud, certainlyy not the boogeyman. If you need to be angry about corruption, then prioritize and be angry at the big fish who really are hurting America (while you are distracted by an outed ex-governor).
posted by , at
9/22/2006 12:56 AM
To The Captain:
And would you like to post your research for critical analysis?
posted by , at
9/22/2006 6:15 PM
Right on, Dale. All the Captain's research has shown...put up or shut up, Captain.
posted by jekelhyde, at
9/22/2006 9:02 PM
Wayne,
Another typically well researched and presented column. I respect your committment to travel and seek out the propigators of bigotry who misuse God's word to encourage discimination toward and condemnation of the GLBT community. You message gains a lot of credibility from your connection, however unpleasant and frustrating it must be, with people like Tim Wilkins. Keep up the good work. I frequently link to your work on my blog.
posted by Jim Johnson, at
9/22/2006 9:41 PM
I'll never forget the sight of Jim McGreevey's wife standing beside him at the podium while he humiliated her before the world. Jim McGreevey was never "forced" into marrying anyone. It was his choice. As a straight woman there is no way I could ever conceive of marrying/making love to another women regardless of the supposed benefits it would provide. He not only mislead his wife but the people of New Jersey when he attempted to install his lover as head the office of Homeland Security. He proved that his lust knew no bounds and everyone (i.e. his wife, parents, children, and the citizens of his state) were secondary to his needs. Quite simply, Jim McGreevey, is a hedonistic, amoral, self-absorbed coward who ruined the lives of the people who loved him most. Some hero.
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posted by Roger David, at
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心中一阵不安升降机，因为我忽然又想起了那道剑光升降平台，可怕的剑光升降台，美丽的剑光登车桥。为什么那一剑是那么的美丽货架，却又那么的可怕呢集装袋？在我倒下之前我说地磅，好美的剑塑料托盘，好恨的剑塑料托盘。我倒下了仓储笼。在我失去知觉之前仓储笼，我听到他说北京货架，这叫艺术超市货架，剑的艺术北京货架。
我并没有死广州货架，原来我的心是在右边仓储货架，而是不是左边货架厂。所以在那穿胸一剑之下我并没有死南京货架。
是一阵暴雨把我冲醒了货架公司。听说雨是上天的眼泪深圳货架，也许这天又有人死在那美丽的剑光之下吧服装货架！我张开嘴巴托盘，任雨水打进我的嘴托盘，直冲我的胃塑料托盘。我的伤口又开始流血塑料托盘，但已经不痛了木托盘。试问：仓储笼一个心已经死了的人仓储笼，肉体上的疼痛又算得了什么呢仓储笼？我知道我的刀再练一百年也无法那么美丽仓储笼，那么恨托盘，而且永远别想杀了他托盘。
我退出江湖了手推车，我没有通知江湖上的朋友们静音手推车，并来一个什么金盆洗手静音手推车，因为我的朋友们差不多都被他杀了置物架。我悄悄的走了置物架，隐进了山林之中堆垛架。俨然一个世外高人的样子堆垛架，每天一壶绿茶登高车，放在身边的几上登高车，然后或盯着一朵白云超市手推车，或盯着一片树叶物流手推车，或双目紧闭物流台车。我的刀在玉盆中泡了七七四十九天角钢货架，已经没有血腥味了角钢货架。然后我把它放在我的屋顶轻型货架，任它风吹雨打轻型货架。
十年就这年过去了中型货架。为何今天天忽然想起那柄剑中型货架，那道剑光重型货架？而且内心为什么如此不安重型货架？不应该是这样的仓库货架，对于一个喝了十年绿茶的人来说服装货架，面对死上海货架，也已不再惧怕精品货架，不再不安苏州货架，但今天又为何如此呢托盘货架？
莫非是他青岛货架，和他的剑库房货架，加上他的剑光沈阳货架。我已不问江湖之事天津货架，想他十年前也应该坐上武林盟主的位子了杭州货架，一个武林中人做了武林盟主山东货架，这一生还有什么要求的呢文件柜？
我不停的喝着绿茶工具柜。绿茶静心工具柜。但此时怎么也静不下来零件柜。茶已尽工作台。平时茶尽之时工作台，正也是日落之时工作桌。
一定快有什么事情发生了工作桌。
剑还是那美丽的剑Google左侧排名，如果再加上一道剑光吹塑机，就会形成剑的艺术色带，武学的艺术电源插座。
我问反光背心：为何还来找我滚针轴承，我已在十年之前就退出江湖了夜光粉。
他说文化石：因为你没死缎带，因为我没有对手风火轮。
我说激光打标机：十年前已不是你的对手平衡机，何况现在十年未动刀大功率led。
他说磁力泵：放眼天下梯子，只有你一个人是我的对手网眼袋，也只你一个人对我的威胁无尘布。
我不再说话手摇手电筒，因为我不知道说什么手板，我知道我十年前就开始找我毛巾布，发现我没有死就开始找我磁钢。我不死促销台，他心不安模具钢材。
他说时尚配饰：拿出你的刀筛网。
我说齿轮泵：我已无刀天使花房，命托辊，亦可有可无色丁。
他盯着我广告衫，握剑的手越来越紧钢坯，我知道那道美丽的剑光可能随时发出过滤网。在那美丽过后疏水阀，我的生命将画上句号胸章。
阳光照在了刀上发热管，反射到他的脸上手机耳机。他发现了那把刀螺杆，我的刀插销，宝刀蝴蝶，没有鞘的刀工具包。
刀已在我手中点钞机，刀还是那把刀配电箱，人却已不是那个人流苏，因为心不是那颗心沙滩巾。
他为了杀我竟找了我十年氯化镁，而为了和我比武竟帮我从屋顶拿下我的刀来双面胶带，并放在我的手中碳纤维。我忽然发现排线，他也变了汽车座垫，他在后悔十年前将所有高手都杀绝珍珠奶茶。
高手的悲哀太阳伞。
我握紧了刀桥架，我看着他的眼tpr，已经不再像十年前那样明亮了钢丝。
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