Wayne Besen - Author, Activist, Columnist, Public Speaker

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Goodbye Gay Conservatives, Don't Let The Door Hit You

(Weekly Column)

To Read at Huffington Post

In response to mounting criticism of gay conservatives, Dale Carpenter, a prominent gay writer, is threatening to bolt the movement. In a recent column, he spoke of his "rising anger" with how gay advocates treat his ideological brethren. Of course, we know this is a bluff because Carpenter and other gay conservatives have nowhere else to go. They are dependent on the very liberalism they condescendingly deride and rejected by the very political party they claim to be a part of.

What is notable about Carpenter's tirade, is how it is at odds with his often intelligent columns. He regularly offers sharp legal critiques and prescient political analysis. However, when discussing gay conservatism, Carpenter uncharacteristically becomes irrational, falling into an undeserved victimhood that is a hallmark of gay Republicans.

For example, Carpenter is upset because Jonathan Crutchley, the co-founder of the gay cruising site Man Hunt, was skewered after giving a contribution to John McCain. Carpenter surmises that there is a witch hunt because of Crutchley's political affiliation. This is not true. If he were just another gay business owner, no one would care whom he contributed to. However, it is preposterous for a man whose commodity is sodomy to give money to a candidate who wants to appoint Supreme Court Justices who would be in favor of outlawing gays from having consensual sexual relations. It is this type of cognitive dissonance that earns gay conservatives such deserved contempt.

Republicans in Congress have blocked gay rights progress for nearly three decades. It was President George W. Bush who stumped for a Federal Marriage Amendment. It was Sen. Majority Leader Trent Lott who once compared gay people to kleptomaniacs and alcoholics. I could fill 10 columns with despicable acts and words lobbed at the GLBT community by members of the Republican Party. While the Democrats are not perfect (see Sam Nunn), anyone who compares the two parties is smoking something that has higher street, than political value.

The modern Republican Party was molded by President Nixon's "southern strategy" and built by Ronald Reagan, a president who ignored the AIDS crisis. It has been home to horrendous bigots, such as Sen. Jesse Helms, Rep. Bob Dornan, commentator Pat Buchanan and Vice President Dan Quayle -- who pushed the term "family values," which notably did not include GLBT families.

In 1988, Republican Pat Robertson ran for president. Robertson lost, but he amassed a huge mailing list, which was transformed into the Christian Coalition. Under the leadership of Ralph Reed, this organization married the Republican Party and this list is today referred to as "The Base."

As long as this crowd is on speed-dial to the White House, gay conservatives are a politically powerless sideshow. This group should be boisterously rooting for a collapse of the GOP, so the party can be rebuilt from scratch as an inclusive entity.

The core problem with Carpenter's arguments, is that he invokes a mythical conservatism that is fighting a liberal straw man. The small government party that wants to keep out of peoples' bedrooms is dead. It has been replaced by a brand of Republicanism represented by Mike Huckabee, Sarah Palin, Rush Limbaugh and Bush. Not only are these politicians anti-gay busybodies, but they aren't even fiscally conservative. In 2009, America is projected to run a half-trillion dollar deficit, plummeting from the seven hundred billion surplus under Bill Clinton.

The issue I have with gay conservatives is that they consistently subjugate GLBT concerns. This is revealed when Carpenter says that "we disagree" with the movements "most visible activists...about how much weight should be given to purely gay issues in a time of economic and military turmoil."

I wasn't aware that Congress had to choose between the economy and protecting GLBT people from job discrimination. I had no idea that passing a hate crime law might hinder our efforts in Iraq and Afghanistan. Apparently, Carpenter and other conservatives think they should get to the back of the line and wait for their rights to be doled out at a time of peace and prosperity (when Democrats are in the White House, I presume).

The truth is, I agree more with Dan Quayle than gay conservatives like Dale Carpenter. Family Values actually do matter and I will not apologize for placing the protection of my family above tax cuts for the very wealthy. Carpenter does not like it when gay conservatives are called self-loathing, but what else can one call people who don't prioritize legal protection for themselves and the ones they love?

If Carpenter and other gay conservatives leave the movement, nothing will really change. Gay progressives will still be doing the lion's share of the work, while conservatives will enjoy the privileges of their newfound freedom, while complaining about those who are largely responsible for their liberty.

47 Comments:

I could not agree more! I was on, of all places, Joe My God when some pissant neocon was talking about how Coming Out was some sort of useless peer pressure exercise for people with no self-esteem! I had to point out to the simp that Coming Out made that website possible in the first place! That Coming Out changed the world enough that gay people can post online without fear of the police rounding us up and tossing us in jail.

I'll make a deal with gay conservatives, they can leave the work to us, they can put gay equality on the shelf until a "better time" comes along and I won't say a thing -IF- they all agree, and all sign contracts stating they will not even think about taking advantage of all the rights we win. They will pretend the closet still exists, they will pretend the glass ceiling exists, they won't get married, or civily unioned, or adopt children. I will keep my trap closed about gay conservatives so long as they don't reap the benefits they didn't bother to help win. So long as they leave the perks of equality to those of us who put our asses on the line to make it happen, they can wait all they want to for the right time to fight for equality.
posted by Jason, at 10/14/2008 8:18 PM

Another great thougtful and informative article. I have never believed there were any 'truly' gay conservatives, except those fortunate enough to be wealthy to enjoy tricle-down economics. Middle and lower class gay Americans have always paid the price for gay Republicans, in marches, protests, demonstrations, service to their country all fighting for equal rights. Interesting to see Dale C, finally getting to the heart of the matter.
Ike
americaforpurchase.com
posted by ikewaller, at 10/14/2008 8:39 PM

Dale Carpenter reminds me of other gay 'conservatives' like Andrew Sullivan and the guy (forgot his name) who used to be editor of the Washinton Blade. They constantly whine about some evil liberal fifth column, but very carefully position their lives smack dab in the middle of exclusive gay enclaves.

Sully demonizes the hedonism of SF gay clones while speaking with reverence of real American values from the heartland. Yet he's been in several open relationships, followed the leather circuit, and even been caught in a barebacking orgy scandal while HIV+. And of course he chooses to live in the liberal gay ghettos of Dupont Circle and P-Town.

The former editor of the Blade lives in Brazil now what would be considered an extremely liberal lifestyle (gay marriage, etc). These guys are the quintessential hypocrites. I never make the mistake of calling them self-hating. In fact, it is quite the opposite - they have a superiority complex. Someone like Mary Cheney lives in multiple mansions with every amenity imaginable. She can buy more rights for her adopted son than even a straight couple might dream of.
posted by CW, at 10/15/2008 12:49 AM

Well said Wayne!! Log Cabin's denial of John McCain's anti-gay record and his ACTIVE support of same sex marriage in 3 states is beyond belief or understanding.

And accepting Sarah Palin without a whimper is unbelievable!!
posted by MrLambda1937, at 10/15/2008 1:35 AM

Wayne, you said:

"Apparently, Carpenter and other conservatives think they should get to the back of the line and wait for their rights to be doled out at a time of peace and prosperity (when Democrats are in the White House, I presume)."

I think this really goes back to the psychology of conservatives vs. liberals. Conservatives are those who not only want but desperately need authority figures in their lives to lead them along. So, if Daddy says fightin' 'dem A-rabs is important and you need to stay at the back of the bus until Daddy says come up front, then they wait, clinging desperately to the belief that one of these days, they'll amass enough courage to ask Daddy a question.

"I can haz rights?"

"Not yet, son."

"Oh well..."
posted by breaktheterror, at 10/15/2008 2:39 AM

First of all, alas, alas, that even this outstanding blog is not saved from jackass spammers like "sex." But I digress. Wayne, you are absolutely right. I don't know whether the subject of your commentary loathes himself. I would imagine that he probably doesn't and is serenely smug in his realization that he is an exceptionalist and probably a reasonably well off one. But he is, without any question whatsoever, a traitor. A donation to John McPander is not just a donation to John McPander. It is a donation to allow Sarah Palin to become the legendary one heartbeat away from the White House (and I do not use the word lightly, but GOD FORBID!), it is a donation to allow the radical right to control the Supreme Court for the next several generations, it is a donation in support of the ability of true maniacs such as Sally Kern to do their worst, it is a donation to continue George and Dick's Excellent Adventure in Iraq (of course noting that Mr. Carpenter is not welcome to take part), and it is a donation in support of the idea that Mr. Carpenter, Wayne Besen, the entire staff and membership of the traitorous Log Cabin Republicans, and all LGBT people, including myself, do not have the right to exist in the first place. To misquote Clark Gable: Fie on you, Mr. Carpenter! You bloody well should give a damn!
posted by Kārlis Streips, at 10/15/2008 3:00 AM

Talk about a majgor disconnect from reality! How in the world can these LCRs actually sit there, spout this Repug nonsense and then go take advantage of the community they work to undermine?!

I have known only a couple of Log Cabiners over the years, and in my book, they were BOTH hypocrites. Both spouted the Repug party line, yet they wanted all the rights that the more liberal, activist part of the gay community has fought for, but haven't to come to see the absurdity of their position.

What really blows my mind, Wayne, is that these people keep getting kicked in the teeth by the party they so slavishly cling to and defend. Last time I checked, the Bible referred to this sort of thing as "kicking against the goads". The Repugs have done everything to make their rejection of the Log Cabiners perfectly clear (except for their donations, of course) and these idiots don't get it. They just don't get it! Log Cabiners are PITIFUL.

I had an interesting conversation with my uncle who has been a lifelong Republican. He is completely fed up with what the Republican Party has become over the last 30 years or so. He knows I am gay and that I married my spouse last year in Canada...he is completely supportive. I brought up the excuse used by the Religious Wrong and Co. against same-sex marriage-- namely, that it will destroy straight marriage.
He said that is the most absurd thing that he has ever heard...his attitude is that he's been very happily married for 50 years now, and that he doesn't have a problem with same-sex marriage being legal in the US since there is no way in hell that a straight marriage is going to be threatened by allowing same-sex marriage. Since it doesn't impact him or his wife, he is in favour of allowing people of the same gender to marry He said he can understand our wanting the same rights and advantages of straight marriage and thinks anyone threatened by the marriage of two same-sex people has some real, serious problems.

By the way, I was suprised when, at the viewing of my mum's body at the funeral home this past May, I introduced my spouse (we married in Canada last year), my relatives were totally supportive. They said that had they known of our wedding, the would have been more than happy to attend and celebrate with. I didn't invite any relatives except for my mum , who did attend, because I honestly didn't know how the rest of my family would react. I'm definitely out and proud, but I don't go out of my way to offend family. It was nice to hear that my family doesn' have a problem with my having married a same-sex spouse.

Interestingly, even as Log Cabiners continue to kiss Repug derriere, I have talked with many lifelong Republicans who say that they are going to vote Democrat for the first time in their lives, since, as one man put it: "I didn't sign on for what the Republicans have come to stand for, which is the oppression of everyone who doesn't fit their paradigm."
posted by cf-ioan, at 10/15/2008 5:16 AM

"If he were just another gay business owner, no one would care whom he contributed to."

I'm not sure that this is accurate. Certainly, the furor would not have been what it was, but I will say that I would think twice about patronizing any business that would give money to this or any recent Republican presidential candidate (not any Republican, as there are a few good ones still around, but there has been no Rep prez nominee in my voting life who was not owned and operated by the christianism industry.)
posted by translegalhistorian, at 10/15/2008 10:37 AM

Excellent job Wayne, you told it like it is. The laughably named "Independent" Gay Forum is a joke, its just another right wing echo chamber. Carpenter demonstrates his true colours by disabling comments on his article. He doesn't want anyone to question what he says, he wants to dictate to them how things should be and exposes himself as the wannabe authoritarian he is.

The gay conservatives over there fight to advance the anti-gay Republican machine, they are a lead weight on the cause of equality, it'll be no loss if they want to leave the movement they were no help to in the first place.
posted by Priya Lynn, at 10/15/2008 3:21 PM

At the last two gay events that have been held here in Philly, there has not been a trace of the Log Cabiners. Last year at Pride Fest they had a booth, but this past Pride Fest they were absent. Then at OUTfest last weekend I did not see them anywhere. Maybe I didn't look hard enough. Or maybe in Philly - a town that's so blue if you look at us long enough you think your PC has crashed - they sense a great unwelcome. Obama buttons, pins, shirts, posters, and flyers are ever-present in gay events. It might be a mutually beneficial decision - I'm sure many in the Gayborhood are saying "So long, screw ya, see you in St. Loo-ya."
posted by Emily K, at 10/15/2008 11:43 PM

Although I have great respect for Wayne Besen's work examining the "ex-gay" industry, I find his recent crusade against gay Republicans exceedingly troubling.

As I have argued elsewhere (http://www.washingtonblade.com/2008/10-10/view/columns/13389.cfm), this kind of snarkiness from the left is flatly inconsistent with Barack Obama's vision of cross-party dialogue that is respectful and civil, and it is especially disheartening when deployed against other members of our own gay community. Besen's recent columns on gay Republicans represent "old politics" at its worst: disrespectful, polarizing, and ultimately counterproductive. Venting on someone may feel good, but it can easily go to far, and resisting it is a challenge that we all sometimes fail to meet.

But as even Besen grudgingly acknowledgs between snide comments here, Dale Carpenter -- who is a colleague in the legal academy, sounding-board, and personal friend -- has been an extremely valuable voice in public debates about the whole range of gay-rights issues confronting our community. To imperiously dismiss him with a snarky comment like "don't let the door hit you" is not only unfair to Dale, it is irresponsible to the entire community, which has benefitted tremendously from Dale's compelling contributions to public debate on gay issues, particularly his willingness to take on gay-hostile conservatives from within their own philosophical frame of reference. I don't agree with Dale on everything. Indeed, my view on Mr. Crutchley is closer to Wayne's than to Dale's, as I've said to Dale. But at the end of the day, Dale has earned a hell of lot more respect than this petty column gives him.

In Besen's stampede to snarkiness, for example, he distorts or fails to grasp Dale's dilemma. When Dale speaks, for example, of maybe prioritizing national security over gay rights, he is NOT saying that the government cannot address both simultaneously. What he is saying is that he believes one candidate is the best choice on gay rights, while the other candidate is the best choice on national security. I don't happen to agree with him on that and prefer Senator Obama on both issues. But for Dale, he has to choose either McCain for national security or Obama for gay rights, so he is, indeed, forced to prioritize one over the other in order to decide which candidate to support. Besen may think Dale is wrong on thinking McCain is better on national security, and I agree. But Dale has a different view of it, and the fact that he is gay does not mean that he must embrace the Democratic Party's position on foreign policy.

Besen also blinds himself to the acuteness of the gay Republican dilemma in this election. Finally, the party has nominated a candidate who, on social issues, is significantly more moderate than usual. His election represents an opportunity, given the power of a president over his party, to significantly shift the GOP away from its most antigay elements. McCain, sadly, hasn't been exhibiting as much of that moderation during the heat of the campaign, but in my view, it lies below the surface and was more apparent in his 2000 race. For gay Republicans, he represents a real chance to move the party a bit toward the center in its disposition toward gays and lesbians. It might ultimately fail, but there is an opportunity there. If Besen would stop stereotyping gay Republicans for a second and try to look at the election strategically from their perspective in terms of intraparty dynamics, he might offer something more insightful than this collection of personal insults and snarky retorts--something more consistent with the caliber of his own work on "ex-gay" groups.

Some progressives and moderates--myself certainly included--are absolutely fed up with the snarky bickering and posturing by BOTH conservatives and progressives, within the gay community as well as outside it. It is precisely why some of us were inspired by Barack Obama in the Democratic primaries and rejected Hillary Clinton's promise of just more hyperpartisan warfare. Besen's recent tirades against gay Republicans epitomize the very same phenomenon. And whatever the case may be in the general population, we at least ought to be able to be a little more respectful of each other within the gay community.
posted by J. Stephen Clark, at 10/16/2008 9:20 AM

Dale Carpenter never has been part of the queer civil rights movement. He always has worked to promote heterosexual supremacy.
posted by libhom, at 10/19/2008 9:57 AM

I just hope that gay progressives don't throw us gay libertarians out with the gay conservative bathwater. Dale Carpenter does not speak for us.
posted by KipEsquire, at 10/19/2008 12:20 PM

The comments here demonstrate the frustration conservative gays have with our liberal brothers.

There seems to be little room for compromise and acceptance. And I don't want to be a part of that. To villify me because I am conservative (though I identify more as Libertarian these days because Republicans have forsaken the idea of small government) in my eyes, is the same as the conservatives do to me because I am gay.

Its not being a victim. I choose to hold onto my political beliefs because I think they are best for this country.

I go to the marches, the parades, I write letters to the editorial and donate to the No on prop 8 campaign. I challenge my fellow conservatives on their incorrect views of homosexuals. I write letters to my elected officials.

How is that not working for equal rights?????????? Why do I have to vote for a candidate based solely on his view on homosexuality. (Which by the way Obama doesn't support gay marriage either.)

There is such disdain in this post and these comments. As if your minds can not be open enough to the possibility of diversity within the gay community. Thats the same intolerance I get from my religious people in my life. Its my way or the highway. They say "a gay christian cant exist" some here say "a gay conservative cant exist"

Well I can. And I do. And I hope that some of you give the acceptance you demand from others!

:)
posted by Pomoprophet, at 10/21/2008 12:10 PM

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